The Yotes

I am a Coyote fan.  So much.  If you don't know this, you don't know me.  One of the hardest things about this fall is going to be missing the football games.  The closest I'll be is 7 hours away when they play in Arizona in a few weeks.  I'm trying to convince myself that I don't need to go, that it's too far away.  They won't win most likely but you never know.  They weren't supposed to win when they played Minnesota a few years ago as well.  I'm listening to the game now, so I think I'll just pretend that every game is an away game.  Both my parents update me as well.  I hope they do better this year than last year.  They just scored!  Hopefully it won't be the only time that they lead this game.  They deserve a good season.  7 hours is too far to go for a football game...7 hours is too far to go for a football game...

The unpacking

I'm still no where near unpacked.  I keep buying more stuff and not doing anything with it.  I have so. much. school stuff and it's still not enough.  This district provides nothing.  I'm looking at it as an investment.  I have to.  I just keep thinking of more things I need to buy.  Dining room table, bookshelves, random shit that I probably don't actually need...

I don't know what it is, but I always think Thursday night is Friday and I don't have to work the next day and that Friday night is some other night but I do have to work the next day.  I actually have tons of plans this weekend.  I should probably stay home and unpack and do school work, but I don't want to.  I want to be social!  It's with people that I already know--one of whom I haven't seen in years and will be the only person I know at the place, but still.  Being social is part of why I moved here.

The car

Oh my goodness.  I almost would rather still be apartment hunting than trying to figure out how to register my car in California and get a driver's license.  There are so many if's that I'm going crazy.  I just want a list that says exactly what I need to bring.  I think it's there on the website, but I can't get it to open.  So much is online now that I need to figure out what I need to print and what I don't have to.  My brain is spinning.  I have an appointment now to get it done.  It all seems to be falling into place?

The First Homesickness

My furniture came yesterday so I'm staying at my apartment now.  With the realness of not staying in a hotel anymore, the homesickness really kicked in.  I'm not super thrilled with my job and I think that had some to do with it.  So yesterday, I had slept two hours the night before and was completely exhausted.  Unpacking is overwhelming when you have a lot of stuff but not a lot of shelves and places to put it.  Overall, I was just sad.  I expect a lot more of those days.  I didn't eat anything at all and wasn't hungry.  I had a Starbucks Refresher that I bought at Ralph's (grocery store) because food didn't look good.  Then I had most of an Oreo shake from Jack in the Box later.  Flako came over in the evening and he took me to Fry's to go buy a TV.  That actually made me feel a lot better.  I stayed in bed today until noon, partly because it was a new bed, partly because of being sad, and partly because I could.  I realized that it was the first time I could kind of relax in a long time--before the summer probably.  I'm not as homesick today.  I'm trying to get through my ridiculously long to do list now but my mind is on other things.  I've tried to call a few people to catch up so hopefully they'll call me back soon.  It motivates me a little more to actually do stuff then.

The First Day

Today was the first day with students.  I had one.  One student.  I have three on my list.  One started today.  One starts on Monday.  The other starts in September.  The one I had today is four.  She is very sweet, fairly quiet, wants to please.   The other two are new three year olds and will be much more challenging, I guarantee it.

My classroom is all special education.  In one way I'm ok with it.  I won't have brand new three year olds with a disability in the same classroom as a girl who is reading and understanding (understanding is actually the key).  I also won't have any models.  Finding simple activities is actually going to be more difficult than I thought it would be.  It's mostly a change in mindset, I think.  I could find activities for my kids in Bellevue and then adapted them.  I'll need to start lower than I did before from what I understand of these kids so far.

This week, I don't have an aide either.  What's the point (to some extent) when there's only one kid.  It would be nice for liability purposes, but oh well.  I said I wanted one on Monday when the other kid starts.  For the first part of the year, the aide I'll have is actually a sub, but she's the aide in the morning (the classes have different aides).  The district is very short on SPED aides this year.  I guess they've started the hiring process, but of course it takes awhile.  Can't say I'm terribly impressed since they've known about some of the vacancies for a long time and we just had SUMMER when there was all this TIME without kids.

I actually spent the morning sort of doing work.  I printed stuff out, made lists, wrote a parent letter (not a good one, but something that will do for now).  I still need to do lesson plans for this week and next week.  I miss my scholastic books the most out of all my school stuff back in Vermillion.  I think I might have Mom start sending me some, through USPS flat rate boxes or something.  Books are heavy which means they'll be expensive to mail.  I did a quick Scholastic book order today.  I wanted a timer like the one I had in Bellevue and then I ordered some eBooks as well as two actual books.  There are such limited supplies at this school.  Teachers are responsible for everything it seems.  Like bring your own copy paper to the machine kind of everything.

It never fails.  After the first day, my brain thinks it's done and forgets that I have to do it again tomorrow.  Even with just one kid! I already set my alarm for the morning.  I'm in a good routine for the morning here but all that will change after this weekend when I actually am in my apartment!

The First Week

I left straight from the BHP, early on August 7.  The first day I drove 15 hours and stopped at a Super 8 in Cedar City, Utah.  I was surprised that the day went so fast.  There was barely any time that I was going crazy being bored.  I was really emotional leaving the BHP.  I'm not going to lie.  I spent the majority of Wyoming and parts of Utah crying.  Wyoming was pretty in that western kind of weird pretty.  I had no idea Independence Rock was in Wyoming or that it was so HUGE.  I totally thought it was in Nebraska.  There was basically no phone service anywhere in Wyoming so I'm glad it went fairly fast.  The scenery changed drastically right at the border of Wyoming and Utah.  I couldn't believe it.  Wyoming was brown, golden, and fairly flat.  Utah was green and mountainous.  I wanted to get to St. George because that's where Flako says he usually stops.  I stopped at Cedar City, UT.  I hadn't reached the point where I knew I should drive anymore, but I was exhausted when I got to the motel, which I did not have a reservation for.  The room they gave me had a GIANT whirlpool tub in it.  I was actually disappointed it was there.  I really wanted to use it but was so tired that I knew if I got in it, I would probably fall asleep.  I sent an email that I had been thinking about all day, let the important people know where I was, and fell asleep.

The next day, I think I drove six hours.  When I got to St George, I was so glad that I had stopped earlier.  There is no way I would have made it that next 45 minutes.  Utah, Arizona, Nevada, and California all were beautiful to drive through.  Almost every curve I drove around I thought "wow."  Truly gorgeous.  I felt really lucky.  Even when my A/C stopped working for the last hour of the desert, I was crazy hot, and my phone stopped working for a bit because it overheated.  I still felt lucky.  I drove 1294.5 miles from the top of the hill at the BHP to the hotel in Arcadia.

I checked into the hotel, first going to the wrong one.  There's two literally around the corner from each other.  I moved all my stuff into my room from my car.  It took three trips with those hotel baggage carts.  Then I went off to find where I was supposed to go the next day.

On Friday, I went to the district office to actually meet the HR lady and to fill out some paperwork.  I had to get fingerprinted in CA before I was technically allowed to start work and before they could offer me a contract (which I realized I still haven't signed...)  I went and got fingerprinted and then went off to Pasadena to go apartment hunting.  The first week is a blur of apartments and streets.

I started work on Monday.  Last week was an introduction of the district and whatnot.  Nothing very exciting.  A lot doesn't apply to ECSE (Early Childhood Special Education).  One of the biggest problems I had was that I share a classroom and the other teacher didn't start back until today.  There was a lot that I couldn't do or actually wouldn't do without her there.  I'm not going to move stuff around without checking with her first.  I teach in the afternoon which is when Cristina used to teach, so I have a lot of questions for her about how she ran her classroom in the space so I at least have an idea.

Last week was a lot of work and apartments.  That was pretty much it.  Mom and I got pedicures on Friday.   Saturday, after dropping off the deposit, we went to the LA Zoo.  It's a nice zoo...or I'm sure it will be when it's not ridiculously hot and I'm more relaxed.  It's no Omaha, but nowhere is.  Sunday, we picked up the apartment keys and went shopping for apartment stuff.  New couch, bed, computer (mine died over the summer), and basic kitchen stuff.  It's all a little ridiculous. We also had dinner with Bob and Minnie, which was so nice.  We ate and played some card games.

I'm ready to get settled and start setting up my apartment.  I'm ready to have kids in my classroom.  Not really, because I haven't done anything to actually get ready for them (or for her....the one on my list so far...).  I made a comment today that the things that I want to do won't take me that long.  The teacher I was talking to said "oh no, it's going to take a long time."  Yeah, it will take longer than I think it will, but I know my working style and what I will do for school.  I also wanted to tell her that just because I look young doesn't mean that I don't know what I'm doing, but that's for a different post.  I have a lot more feelings about everything but I'm getting tired and need to get ready for tomorrow when I have to actually get work done.  More writing later.

The Apartment

I hate apartment hunting.

I spent all summer looking at places online.  Not having a job meant no idea what my income would be.  Not having been here before meant no idea how safe it was.  I looked anyway.  I made a reservation at an extended stay hotel not terribly far from work until September 1 so I would have time to go looking for places and hopefully not feel rushed into something I didn't really want.

When I started looking online and in person, I wanted to be in a busier place, close to public transportation (the Gold Line specifically), in Pasadena.  I looked online and I drove up and down the streets of Pasadena.  I found the perfect apartment the first day I looked.  By the time I got to the rental place to turn in my application, someone else had already turned in theirs.  That was so discouraging.  I kept looking of course.

Have I mentioned how much I hate apartment hunting?  No place felt right.  Thank GOD Mom came to help.  She spent the days while I was at work calling and looking at places.  I met up with her after work and looked at places.  I started looking farther away from Pasadena.  I wanted to stay somewhat near the area still.  It was not terribly far from work (ish) but it was also not terribly far (ish) from friends.  Friends was important.  I didn't want to be so far that I wouldn't ever see them so that definitely factored into where I wanted to find a place.

FINALLY.  It seemed a lot longer than it was.  A week after I got here, Mom found me a place.  She was going to look at a different place and saw a sign for "washer and dryer included."  I really wanted laundry in my apartment.  As much as I hated Bellevue, I was spoiled with that apartment--laundry, dishwasher, 1 bedroom....  Mom decided to call the place, just to see how much it was, thinking it would probably be out of my price range.  It wasn't!  We went to go see it after work and I really liked it.  We went to go see one more after that and I liked that one a lot too and it was cheaper but it didn't have laundry.  I went back and forth in my head A LOT but decided that laundry was worth paying more.  It had almost everything I wanted--no dishwasher  :-( --and I felt safe.  That part was HUGE.  I was supposed to go look at a few places before and just didn't feel safe there so didn't even look.

We dropped off the application and fee on Friday.  Deposit on Saturday.  I haven't signed the lease yet but I got the keys on Sunday and have a cartload of stuff from Target there already.

One of the things I did was leave pretty much EVERYTHING I owned at Mom's storage unit and house (thanks Mom!).  So I have nothing for an apartment.  Everything I have is basically clothes.  I could fit everything I brought into my car and into a tiny dorm room at the BHP.  That means this move is RIDICULOUSLY expensive, but I have very supportive and HELPFUL parents.  New bed and couch will be delivered soon and then I'll start staying at the apartment and then maybe it will feel like I actually live here.  This hotel is fine, but living in my own place will be much better.

The Job

I was going to move to California without a job.  Not the best idea, but I was determined.  Applying for jobs with limited internet access this summer was not the easiest.  One day, my brain completely flipped out on me and I applied to every job I possible had the information for.  California has one website that the majority of schools use.  That was ridiculously helpful.  I was great at checking the website but not the best at actually applying.  This day in July, I was.  The fear of being unemployed had finally set in.  During the past school year, I was pretty convinced that I needed a break from the public schools and schools in general.  The problem is that I know public schools.  I don't know the privatized education whatever.  The summer was a great education break and I had fear so applied to public schools.  I applied to a few.  One day about two weeks later, I got a phone call.  Being at the BHP, there isn't the best phone service and it was strike so it was busy.  I climbed the hill, listened to the message, and took a huge breath.  Monrovia Unified wanted to interview me.  They called on Monday.  I interviewed in the BHP Business Office on the phone on Tuesday.  They offered me the job on Wednesday.  I had very little information about the job or the district, which was concerning in a way, but I accepted anyway.  I started August 9.

I'm an SDC (Special Day Class) Preschool Teacher.  What that means is that I have all students with special needs.  Mine will be more moderate to severe.  I only teach one class a day and it's all SPED.  There are lots of differences from Bellevue--some good, some to be determined--and it will definitely be bringing it's challenges.  I have a very small class to start.  I really have done very little to get ready for Thursday, which means the next two days are going to be very stressful.  I'd write more about it but I really don't much more than what I've already written.  That should probably change...

The Big Decision

The first time I was ever in California was for Christmas 2011.  Mom and I weren't going to see Kendra so we went to San Diego instead.  I loved it.  In the summer of 2012, Mom let me go with her on the Weston Noble Alumni Choir tour.  We went to San Francisco, Santa Barbara, Los Angeles, and San Diego.  I loved it even more.  I was already unhappy in Nebraska.  I had looked for a different job for the 2012-13 school year, but decided not to take the one I was offered.  The benefits didn't outweigh the drawbacks at the time.  After the California tour, I started really thinking about living in California.  It was so different and that was what I needed.  I felt stuck in Nebraska.  I was turning 30 and something had to change.

I had jokingly discussed moving to San Francisco with a friend before, but by this point, it wasn't joking anymore.  San Francisco wasn't my first choice but if my friend was going to be there too, it was higher on the list.  I knew I needed to leave Nebraska and wanted to go somewhere that I was starting over but already had friends.  I have friends in Los Angeles.  In the 6 hours I had been there before I was shocked at how much I liked it.  I never expected to like it.  Eventually my friend decided not to move to CA, so Los Angeles was now on the top of my list.

Education in the United States is really struggling.  California is not the best place to go be a teacher with budget cuts happening everywhere like crazy.  Still, I turned in all my paperwork to get a California teaching credential at the end of October, knowing it was going to take awhile.  Oh my goodness.  What a pain.  I had to send in 3 letters from HR in Bellevue because they weren't specific enough.  The last one was basically "Kirsten is a teacher.  She has worked here for 4 years.  She is employed full time.  She has been employed as a full time teacher for all four years."  On the last day of school, I woke up for some reason at 3am, checked my email, and saw that my credential had finally been approved.  I took that as a sign.

I really struggled with the decision about staying in Bellevue.  While I knew something needed to change, it's really hard to voluntarily say that you'll be unemployed.  I was also really close to a few people at school and while I think they "knew" that I was going to leave, I still had to tell them myself.  Telling another teacher and the SLP was so hard.  I wanted them to come with me!  When we got the sheet asking if we were returning or not, we had over a week to turn it in.  I completely freaked out.  I hadn't applied to any jobs.  I had no real idea even what city I was going to move to.  One worry after another.  It was finally a text from a friend that said "Don't sign and don't worry" that almost gave me the mental ok that I could do this.